Joke Time: Filipino Excuse Letters

(From a media loop)
These are excuse notes from parents (including original spelling)collected by schools from all over the country. 

1. My son is under a doctors care and should not take P.E. today.Please execute him. (Hala! Sige. Silya elektrika at bitay. Sabay pa! O kaya niyo yun?) 

2. Please excuse Lisa for being absent. She was sick and I had hershot. (Pag nag-absent pala papatayin ka…Baka may rabies…) 

3. Dear School: Please ekscuse John being absent on Jan. 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, and also 33. (Aba grabe to. Nasa kalendaryo pa ang birthday ko kung ganon. Hahaha!) 

4. Please excuse Gloria from Jim today. She is administrating.(Ano daw???? ) 

5. Please excuse Roland from P.E. for a few days. Yesterday he fell outof a tree and misplaced his hip. (Hanapin natin!) 

6. John has been absent because he had two teeth taken out of his face.(Bwehehehe..-. la ako masabi… Bwahahaha! Ganito kasi yan. Kinagat siya ni Lola sa noo sa gigil. Tapos nabali yung ngipin ng pustiso niya.Hahaha!!! ) 

7. Megan could not come to school today because she has been botheredby very close veins. (Buti pa veins niya. Close sila. Hahahaha!!!) 

8. Chris will not be in school cus he has an acre in his side. 

9. Please excuse Ray Friday from school. He has very loose vowels.(Aah…..eh.-…i…..-ow….u..-..) 

10. Please excuse Pedro from being absent yesterday. He had(diahre)(dyrea)-(direathe) the shits. [words in ()s were crossed out.](Sinabi na kasi LBM na lang e. Pasosyal pa kasi.) 

11. Irving was absent yesterday because he missed his bust.(So transsexual pala si
Irving?) 

12. I kept Billie home because she had to go Christmas shopping becauseI dont know what size she wear. 

13. Sally wont be in school a week from Friday. We have to attend herfuneral. (
Ala e! Mabuhay ang Patay!! Mayroong Himala!!!) 

14. Please excuse Jason for being absent yesterday. He had a cold andcould not breed well. (Stud service ba yung school nya? baka gremlins siya.) 

15. Gloria was absent yesterday as she was having a gangover. (Ay grabe! Iba na talaga ang mga kabataan ngayon. Hahaha!) 

16. Maryann was absent December 11-16, because she had a fever, sore throat,headache and upset stomach. Her sister was also sick, fever and sore throat,her brother had a low grade fever and ached all over. I wasnt the best either,  sore throat and fever. There must be something going around, her father even got hot last night. Hahaha, telenovela..-. bow. Makuwento siya ha… Kulang lang sa pansin…)

17. Please excuse Jennifer for missing school yesterday. We forgot to get the Sunday paper off the porch, and when we found it Monday, we thought it was Sunday. (Winner to!!!!!!!!!! Anggaling!!!-! Puwede rin kaya sa office ito?)

About mindanaw

A Journalist from Mindanao

22 responses to “Joke Time: Filipino Excuse Letters”

  1. Angelica says :

    nice jokes! just surfing the wordpress blogs and saw yours!

    mabuhay!

  2. mindanaw says :

    Salamat po!
    Thanks f or dropping by.
    God speed!

  3. nec says :

    what a loser. copied from another site. yeah right damn funny. well… the joke’s on you!

  4. mindanaw says :

    Hi Nec,

    Thanks for honoring this post with you spending time to comment on it.
    If you have actually read this post the attribution is in the first line (“from a media loop”) . Meaning it came from an e-group of media friends. There is no illusion that this was original.

    Unfortunately, it seems you might have chosen to personify your comment. Peace bitaw!

  5. bianca says :

    haaahahahha!! i love it! you should post more of those.🙂

  6. pompits says :

    these jokes suckk!!!!they aint even funny!!

    losers!!! unfortunately,,ur..like what they say it in the philippines..”KORNY”!!!!

  7. blue says :

    sobrang nakakatawa kaya, lolz

  8. mindanaw says :

    Hi pompits, grab a life!

  9. Kostanic says :

    All Greetings ! ! !
    You are not happy your smile? Toothpaste
    Here you will find all that could change this …

  10. Shahsem says :

    Hey All ! ! !
    Successful people say “Time is money”,
    go Clock ,
    and make sure that …

  11. Alextoss says :

    Hey All ! ! !
    Want to spend your vacation to be remembered for long?
    Tourism
    help you carry out your wishes !

  12. Li Yung Lee says :

    Danda nMn p0…

  13. Li Yung Lee says :

    m0re p0wer….!!!!

  14. max says :

    yeah right media loop. But this isn’t “collected by schools from all over the country.” that’s for sure. You suck with your excuses dude.

    And “Grab a Life?” WTF? now that’s original. and disappointing.

  15. Istambay says :

    To those who find irregularities in this post,

    I cant understand why its really big deal with you. I’m tempted not to respond to your tirades but I’ll speak my mind out anyway. Thanks for expressing your takes in my little corner. I respect your opinion and your right to say it.

    Even if a few expressed their narrow minds via their comments, I’m happy that most of those who gave comments are people with good dispositions in life who know the border between fun and bigotry.

    Istambay sa Mindanao

  16. pinayme08 says :

    diS is so funny ever!
    u cracked me up guYs…
    i LuV fiLo jOks! hehehehe
    i’m so proud 2 da ppoL who made it!
    take care.. ^_^
    God bLess yaS!
    xoxoxox
    ~_~

  17. rissa says :

    thanks for making me laugh:-)

    nice motivational activity for an english class.

  18. berto says :

    Hi there friends!, find your filipino or filipina friends at txtmate.com and send them free sms

  19. fealava says :

    Nice jokes..they made my day after watching and hearing array of disappointing issues on economic crisis all over the world.

    Laughter is still the best medicine!!!!!!

  20. jade says :

    i love them… ang iba “korny” nga ang iba naman napaka orig… hahaha.

    now, it’s not only in the Philippines that teachers receive those kinds of excuse letters… ironically, dito din sa USA, i’m teaching in one of the top high schools in US and sad to say na ang parents din ng mga students ko di rin marunong mag construct ng sentence correctly, not only the parents but also the students, imagine my disappointment… so i guess we have to forgive some of our filipino parents (at least they tried to make it formal by writing excuse letters in english no matter how crooked and boy did they try really hard, saludo parin ako). Dito parang di ko kayang i-forgive kasi it’s their native tongue, and they are supposed to be masters of their language.

    well siguro nangyayari yan kahit sa pinas din with our Tagalog… notice my tagalog sentences? crooked din! maayo pa mag bisaya. hehehe. Bukidnon my home!!! I’m coming home soon.. miss ko na pollution and jeepney honkings, miss ko na traffic, and jollibee is 5 hours drive. I miss chowking, i miss Lim ket kai, Gaisano, SM, oro rama, I miss liceo de cagayan university, i miss my filipino students (who are always polite, and nice, and sweet, and QUIET kahit minsan di naiintindihan ang discussion, when i ask “do you follow?”, yango pa rin ng yango! haaaaaaaaaay!) i miss all of the Philippines!

  21. tatatatata says :

    hahahahahahahahah

  22. james eric says :

    yucks ka weak mo

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: